I Wandered Lonely As A...Weirdo?

My wife...no it's not a costume. She wears it everyday

As my wife wandered slowly
through the last city market,
she wore cape and hat
as she looked for a bargain.

Children staring wide-eyed
came running to look
with "Wow's" on their lips
as their parents' heads shook.

As my wife wandered slowly
past the man selling cider
he continued to talk,
as his eyes just grew wider,

to a customer there
with a questioning itch,
"I use Roma and Braeburn
and look there's a witch!"

As my wife wandered slowly
past the gnarled old man,
he froze and gasped "Nice!"
and reached out a hand.

He stared with such shock,
as if out of the ground
had crawled his dead wife to say:
"Leave the toilet seat down!"

As my wife wandered slowly
through the last city market
I sighed and walked with her
to the car where we parked it.