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[personal profile] realexplodingcat
Before becoming the father of a boy I never intentionally explored my masculinity. This should come as no surprise to those of you who have seen me intentionally wear women's clothing (usually on stage, in front of an audience, to maximize the humiliation). After my son was born, I grew a beard. That was just the beginning. I also bathe less, no longer listen attentively to my wife, and prefer the company of my lawn mower. To celebrate my son's birthday, I took the next step and bought a propane grill (I have to work my way up to charcoal, which is further up the masculine ladder beyond caber tossing).

It felt great cooking for the first time today. Open flames. Beautiful weather. Baby in one arm, hot poker in the other. Cayenne in the eyes. This is the stuff of which men are made. However, one thing struck me as very unmanly: cleaning the grill. Do you really need to clean the grill as thoroughly as the instructions describe? Cleaning isn't very manly (of course neither is reading the instructions), so I don't understand why grilling appeals to men. I'd rather clean a cast iron pot or a steel pan any day. So, what gives? Men of the world, how often do I need to clean my grill?

Date: 2008-04-24 03:46 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile]
If Tim had an LJ, this is what he'd say:

"Ha ha ha giggle snort hee heh *wipes tears of laughter from eyes* haaaah.

Clean the grill? What the *hell* are you talking about!?"

Date: 2008-04-24 03:51 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile]
My host father on the farm in Australia thought I was a city girl and tried to shock me, when I noted that our grill was a sheet of steel held up by bricks, with room for a fire underneath, by telling me that it was "seasoned with possum piss."

He learned not to try to shock me after awhile -- I think when I asked whether they breaded the sheep testicles with breadcrumbs or just flour before deep-frying.

Date: 2008-04-24 03:56 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile]

Fire clean grill. Fire kill all. Fire good.

Date: 2008-04-24 02:58 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile]
Thank you for putting it into language I can understand.

Date: 2008-04-24 02:46 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile]
That sounds like an answer I can trust!

Date: 2008-04-24 03:49 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile]

After it cools off, put it on the ground. It'll be fine.

Date: 2008-04-24 12:58 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile]
well played, [ profile] mactavish. Well played.

Date: 2008-04-24 03:00 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile]
Even higher up the ladder of manliness, somewhere above tearing dictionaries in half with your bare hands, is letting the dog clean the baby's cloth diapers. For some reason, the wife won't let me do that.

Date: 2008-04-24 01:08 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile]
I'm a manly woman. I say you don't clean the grill. You can give it a quick scrub while it's still warm with something coated in metal, and let the guck (technical term) fall into the flames (if there are still flames). The rest can stay and will likely just be burned to "flavor" by the fire the next time you cook.

Makes food taste better, is easier than cleaning, and safer than eating Easy Off.

Date: 2008-04-24 03:47 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile]
Awesome. I'm definitely inclined to grill more if cleaning isn't necessary.

Date: 2008-04-24 01:41 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile]
Just scrape off the big bits into the fire. Preheating next time will take care of the little bits. None of that counts as 'cleaning' so it is still manly.

Date: 2008-04-24 03:21 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile]
That sounds manly. Kind of like caring for cast iron pots. Just a little scraping.

Date: 2008-04-24 03:45 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile]
You're laughing because I tried to clean it, aren't you?

Date: 2008-04-24 05:21 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile]
I'm a girl, but I use fire.

Also, I just scrape my cast iron. I like manly cooking items.

Date: 2008-04-24 06:44 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile]
So far, all my answers have been from girls. I'm beginning to reevaluate grilling's reputation as a masculine activity.
(deleted comment)

Date: 2008-04-24 08:35 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile]
That would explain why the first thing I cooked on the grill didn't really have that grilled flavor.

Date: 2008-04-24 09:49 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile]
A dirty grill is a seasoned grill. Leave it on for a bit after cooking.

Only clean it when it is screaming at you that it needs it.

Date: 2008-04-24 11:22 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile]
More things should only require cleaning after screaming.

Babies ain't manly

Date: 2008-04-24 10:24 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile]
Sorry, but you lost me on the manliness when you mentioned holding the baby while grilling. Dude, leave the rugrat with the women folk shucking the corn and fussing with the ... what do they call it...uhhh... froot? fruit? When you are done grilling your meat, walk away. When it's time to grill again, order your wife to clean the dammed thing... preferably with a toothbrush. You can't possibly have any cajones under that apron.

shit. Wife saw me typing this...


Re: Babies ain't manly

Date: 2008-04-24 11:31 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile]
I love the make-up you're wearing in the user icon! Is it MAC or Sephora? Oh, I bet a manly man like you compounds his own!

Re: Babies ain't manly

Date: 2008-04-25 12:20 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile]
I use whatever you let me borrow!
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